Lifesaver welcome to sos.
I am sorry for the pain you are livning with.
I am glad you found your way here.
I have t.n. and also have anesthesia dolorosa. I know about those kinds of pain. I also have delt with ptsd and heavy depression also attempting.
I am glad your seeing a pro .slowly but surely that helped me as did other things.
not for one second do i wish any of your illnesses were terminal .
ending your life would not make ANYTHING better for you or your family.you need those guts to keep on going !!! you can not imagen the guilt they would have to face and live with each day.
Your family may not understand but I want you to take that a step further... and think this... your family dose not understand how to act or what to do because your sick and living with pain. you didnt have to deal with dark feelings before you got sick.... it is a learning process for everyone. for you for them for the whole lot of us...
can I ask ,are you able to control the t.n. pain with meds or nerve blocks?? I have lots of info on t.n and neuralgia over all and will offer all the help I can give ... with t.n. and anything else.
please do not give up. you will find a new purpose and reason in life. we will help you. thats what this place is all about. helping ,listening, reaching and holding on, picking eachother up. its like a family of non judgemental, wise ,caring amazing people. and I am glad you right next to me cus it is possible I can help somehow. so hold on , do NOT be so hard on yourself. I know how I got so angry at my own body for "letting me down" . please dont give up . I know you can get threw this and find purpose and reason again. we will help you each in our own way help the best we can.
sending low pain positive thoughts and lots of strength to you lifesaver .
PEACE
BMW