[maryfrances]

What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair brunette?


(artificial intelligence!)

[rd42]

What's green, has four legs and if it fell out of a tree would kill you?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
A pool table!

[Suffolkchris]

How does an elephant hide in a cherry tree


Paint its toe nails red

[burckle]

Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternative meanings for common words.

The winners are:

1. Coffee (N.), the person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
3. Abdicate (V.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. Esplanade (V.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly (Adj.), impotent.
6. Negligent (Adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
7. Lymph (V.), to walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle (N.), olive-flavored mouthwash.
9. Flatulence (N.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash (N.), a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Rectitude (N.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
12. Pokemon (N), a Rastafarian proctologist.
13. Oyster (N.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
14. Frisbeetarianism (N.): The belief that, when you die, your Soul flies up
onto the roof and gets stuck there.
15. Circumvent (N.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

Lloyd

[Ronhutton]

Marriage is a 3 ring affair,
First there is the engagement ring,
Then there is the wedding ring,
"
"
"
"
"
"
"
"
"
"
"
"
Then, there is the suffering!!!!!!

Ron

[maryfrances]

Thanks guys

Very cute!

Made me smile!

[chasmo]

Do you know what a red-head is???//











a rusty blonde........

[maryfrances]

Cute, Chasmo

[Thelma]

What did her gorgeous, strong, manly lover say when he heard her big, tall, extremely jealous husband coming up the stairs.........
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.


Hurry hide the room

[vlhperry]

How many third trumpets does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they can't reach that high.

What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?
No one cries when you cut the clarinet in half.

How does an oboest commit suicide?
Joke teller makes a motion over wrist of scraping an oboe reed.

What do they do to those who cannot play a wind instrument?
Put 2 sticks in their hands and call them a drummer.
What do they do when the drummer can't keep the beat?
Take one stick out of their hand and call them a director.

What is the definition of a nerd?
someone who owns their own viola.

I think that just about covers it. Oh, wait. One more:

How many soprano singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they just stand there and let the world revolve around them.