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Old 12-16-2010, 04:09 PM #1
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Frown Had a discogram and feel so down

Hi friends it has been awhile since I have been on here I need to talk really bad.

I just went in for a discogram and the good news is the disc's did not hurt when they put the dye in but the needles about killed me as they tore through scare tissue. Anyway this means the disc is not causing pain.

But what hit me and caused me to cry there in the doctors office was there was no hope in fixing the pain which is horrible in my lumbar spine. I have not stopped crying because I do not want to live the rest of my life like this. I was hoping it was something they can fix. I just want to be better.

It turns out to be the disc that is already fused causing me the problems and there is no way to fix that. I have partial medal in my spine that causes allot of pain on my left side could it be the medal in there?

On top of all this my neck fusion caused allot of problems and nerve damage. Well on top of that I am dealing with massive neck pain that shoots through my thoracic spine and I am living in neck braces. Well I am suppose to have MRI's but my insurance declined them. I had to fight to appeal it.Well now I am starting to think what is the point my life is living in pain.

I just getting to a place I can not handle this anymore. I am tired of being tired, I am tired of living in constant pain and headaches. I am tried of not getting sleep and up off and on all night. I will not spend the rest of my life on drugs laying around with no purpose. I was not born to with no purpose i have a purpose and pain and drugs is not my purpose.


Thanks of listening.

Jeanie
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Old 12-16-2010, 06:57 PM #2
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Hi dear Jeanie ~ I'm a member of that same "club." We are the "always in pain" and hating it club. LOL I am inoperable too - I have DDD, osteoarthritis, Osteoporosis, severe sciatica, peripheral neuropathy, and all kinds of other lovely things. I've been dealing with this for 26 years now, and in pain all that time. It's NOT getting any better either -- in fact now my knees have gone to pot.

How do I cope with it??? Well I visit 3 different Chronic pain sites, and read what others have to go thru - and that keeps me humble and grateful. You wouldn't believe what some people have to contend with!!! You know the old adage - if we all put our troubles in a big pile - chances are, we'd WANT ours back rather than to take someone elses!! I sure would.

Are you undermedicated??? If you're suffering big time, then you need to find another doctor who will give you the PROPER drugs you need to treat your pain! Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. God bless you dearheart, and take care. Hugs, Lee
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recovering alcoholic, sober since 7-29-93;severe depression; 2 open spinal surgeries; severe sciatica since 1986; epidurals; trigger points; myelograms; Rhizotomy; Racz procedure; spinal cord stimulator implant (and later removal); morphine pump trial (didn't work);now inoperable; lumpectomy; radiation; breast cancer survivor; heart attack; fibromyalgia; on disability.



Often the test of courage is not to die, but to live..
.................................................. ...............Orestes
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