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Old 06-01-2007, 04:16 PM #1
rashelle rashelle is offline
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Hi, I don't know if this is the right place or the right way, but i'm so tired. I have a 30 year old brain damaged son, a husband with a broke back and a six year old grandson, all looking at me for there every need. I can't stop crying. My son gets a small check the first of the month. He starts right in on me to go shopping. I hate to shop with him because he doesn't understand the value of money. He hates his father so I have to take care of him myself. He has frontal lobe damage so he is like a robot. No feelings. How rude of me to complain, he can't help it. Most of the time he's about 12. My husband worked all his life and now can't even move furniture. My six year old is a delight. I use to be so full of life. I have to work at every step I take now. I try to not think of all this, so I clean and clean my house. I have flowers to plant, but I just can't. I had a sister at 42 was murded and a brother a 48 died with a brain turmer. I fell so bad when I think God let them of easy. I don't want to live anymore. Don't worry, I love these guys to much to ever do that to them. I just wish I could get some real help. My body feels so heavy and tired. I can't just sleep all the time, they could hurt themselves. Oh well, enough , you get the picture. Sorry if this went on and on.
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Old 06-01-2007, 04:28 PM #2
Curious Curious is offline
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awww sweety, you came to the right place.

you have more than what a person should have to handle.

does your grandson live with you? mine is 5. he lives with us.

i really do understand where you are coming from. i have been at that point myself. overload. physical and emotional. my special friends here have been the glue that keeps this monkey together.

i'm just a pm away.
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Old 06-01-2007, 04:45 PM #3
Lara Lara is offline
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aww rashelle, I'm so sorry.
It all sounds awfully overwhelming for you there.
I wondered if there was some way of getting some respite? Have you ever looked into that with regard to your older son? I live in Australia so I don't know how that all works wherever you live but there might be some way of getting some respite so that you can have a little "rashelle time". Especially in light of the fact that your husband is somewhat incapacitated due to his injury. There must be some way of getting a little assistance even if it's temporary. I know what it's like not to have any support when I really needed it under different circumstances but still similar in many ways. It sounds to me as if you need some really practical help to help you get through this difficult time so that you can get strong again and back to feeling in control.

edited to add:
Maybe someone who is closer to your area might know of some type of services available, rashelle. My problem was always that I'm a very stubborn and independent person ... subborn as a mule they tell me, who would not even accept help even if it was offered. eeeek. I sure wish I had been able to find some respite though. It might have saved an awful lot of grief and overwhelm just at certain times. If there was some way to get some respite, would you take it? Sounds a silly question I know, but I'm serious about how I found it difficult to ask for help.
sending lots of thoughts your way
Keep talking.
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Old 06-01-2007, 08:59 PM #4
rashelle rashelle is offline
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My grandson has been with us from age 6 months. My son and his wife were supose to move into thier new house the sat. after the accident. His wife left him before he got out of intensive care. He came kind of out of it about 5 months later. We got both him and the baby. I love him so much. It makes me sick to see him like this. My heart breaks and breaks everyday. God forgive me ,but sometimes I think it would have been better for all if he would have died. I've lost my son. I've lost my son.
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Old 06-01-2007, 09:03 PM #5
rashelle rashelle is offline
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we here in the stated they may have to start moviny so of you out of Austraila because of no water. Is that true? I have called and called about so kind of respite, no one calls me back.
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Old 06-01-2007, 09:20 PM #6
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Smile Hi Rashelle...

Girl, you have every right and every reason for feeling the way you do. What you are trying to handle everyday would be a huge load for anyone to handle. I've had a taste of what you describe, but never that severely. I do hope you take to heart what the others have said, and find some way to get some relief for yourself. And if coming to these forums just to vent all your frustration seems to help at all, then vent to your heart's content!

My feelings really go out to you, and I wish that I could help. That there was something I could say which would really make a difference or at least make you feel a little better. I just don't know what that would be. There are many people on these forums who can relate to what you are going through, and are perfectly willing to talk with you and try to help. It may not be as good as having physical help, but it can be the next best thing.

I really hope and pray that the difficulty in your life eases up on you very soon, and you are rewarded for all the loving and caring you have shown toward your family. You are a special person, you know. Many others would just say it's too much, and try to get out of doing what you do. If you ever need to talk, then we are here for you. May God bless you and everyone in your family, and help ease your burden.

With the very best of wishes...

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Old 06-01-2007, 11:21 PM #7
rashelle rashelle is offline
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Idealist, Thank you so very much. Everyone around me is so needy they can'
t hear me cry out. I can see you understand. I don't want to be a cry baby. I have fibro. and some times it all just gets to me. Thank you for the God Bless you, I lean on him alot. Enough now, I must pick myself up and go on. God Bless you to.
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Old 06-02-2007, 12:01 AM #8
shiney sue shiney sue is offline
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Default Rashelle

You are not a cry baby,you are a very tired strong woman and i'm so
glad your here. I know now nothing seems like it will ever be right again.
I wish you were close enough to hug. And how lucky your grandchild is.
Take him out to the garden and let him help you plant some beauty
into this world. I'm 60 and still remember doing this with my loving
grandmother. I also think how tired she was,but she was so loving.

You have a very good heart,and i for one hope you keep posting. These
folks have been so wonderfull to me. And we want to help and Rashelle
we all cry. Bless your heart,come back Sue
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Old 06-02-2007, 04:52 PM #9
Lara Lara is offline
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Hi rashelle,
Just wondering how you're doing there?

Moving out of Australia? No way. Well, they haven't told us that anyway.
Maybe things like this will happen in some 3rd world areas though as the years of famine and drought and continue.

Yes, we do have water problems. Only because politicians have their head in the sand and if they'd actually "thought" years ago we wouldn't be quite in the position we're in now. We have the most amazing resources here, wind, ocean etc., but almost as it's too late they're finally getting the message that it's time to do something. The climate certainly has changed but we've been wasting water for so long it's unbelievable. We're all way overdue here for a reassessment of the way we live. Gosh, it could be so horribly worse. Imagine. We could live in many areas of Africa or Indonesia or so many other places. We are doing it very well where I am.

rashelle, I hope you keep trying with that respite service. Even just a few hours a week at the least would give you time to get some you time.

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