[Aarcyn]

Sometimes it comes down to speaking up.

I have mobility issues. I walk slow, I limp a little, I can stand but not for long periods of time.

I go to the bank on Fridays. There is handicapped parking in front of the building.

I park, get out of the car and walk slowly to the entrance. There is a man in his 50's also walking across the parking lot to go inside.

As I open the door, I stand in the doorway and hold the door for him.

I am INSIDE the bank holding the door. He grabs the door so I let go and continue to walk to the waiting rope.

No one is in line but there are two tellers and both have a person doing business. That means I would be next.

He walks quickly AROUND me and gets in line first!!!

I am doing a slow burn inside. At first, I think I will just let it go but it was too rude. He saw I parked in the handicapped, I walk SLOW so he should know I am not faking. Even without the handicap, it was inexcusable.

But becoming angry is wrong.

Speaking up is good for the soul.

He is making sure he looks everywhere but at me.

So in a nice conversational voice I said, "You must be in a very big hurry."

He immediately backed away and said "You can go in front of me."

"You must be in a very big hurry," I responded.

He made no apology. In fact, he rationalized his action by saying, "Well, the person with the longer stride gets to the line first."

!!!

He moves behind me, giving about 4-5 feet distance from me. I just continued to look at him, make him feel uncomfortable.

He tells me that he is really a good person. I just look at him. He may be a good person but he was not a good person at that moment. I had no inclination to let him off the hook. He made no apology for his action so there could be no forgiveness anyway.

When I get to the teller, another one next to me opens up as well. I let mine know what he did, loud enough for him to hear.

I was pleasant but I spoke up.

My hope is that he will think twice before walking around anyone ever again. Probably not but for today, maybe.

[weegot5kiz]

Stand your ground Kudos Kudos Kudos

good for you that is something I do not get before my issues with MS and using HC spots or a cane I was always polite and helpful and not rude yet now its like a green light to be ran over around here,

two days ago I was going into store to get my meds and was walking with cane and this Lady ? who could clearly see me struggle with my cane walking, as i am flaring right now, and my right side is useless, and literally pushes me aside to get a cart

needless to say i was a bit ticked off, so when she turned around with her cart I blocked her with my cane and told her ever do that again and I dont care male or female i will knock u on your @ss

( yes I was raised better sorry but she deserved to be plopped down on her kiester) rude arrogant so and so ,it boils me, god help my kids if they ever get caught acting like this i will tanned their hides from here till i cant tan em no more

I too have spoken up in lines, the other day some guy parked in HC spot but he park diagonal so he took up two of them, while in the checkout I proceeding to talk about kittys thread about HC parking out loud ,about taking pictures of license plates and sending them to local police stations of violators and deb got right into it and asked who would park like that , maybe we should go get a pic at which point i said out loud and in line oh I know who parked there, these two guys , the ones in front of me in line,in a big hurry to buy a pepsi they couldnt get out of there fast enough,

I speak out a lot its, rude ignorant and very shallow to think and behave in those fashion, nothing and I repeat nothing is that important to knock someone over to do, or to disrespect someone in the process

see I was doing my best to let this go but am glad you said something cause i feel so much better now


I agree speak out, make them think twice about it, its a shame we even have to say something , me have trouble saying something har har har

[kicker]

You warm the cockles of my heart. (not that I know what those are) You rock!!!!!!!

Before my MS trouble I spoke out, some confuse kindness or a handicap as weakness. I may walk slow but I am here cognitively. I still speak out, but not as much and I should. It's them, not you!!!! (or me or anyone else)

[AfterMyNap]

Good job, Cyn. My big issue is with the elderly who always seem to assume that since I'm not old enough, I must not be handicapped. When they keep giving me the look, I sometimes blurt out, "Hey, at least you got a chance to get old first!"

I admit, I have a bad attitude about it sometimes, but people can just be so inconsiderate like your bank buddy.

[kicker]

When I taught and went out with different handicapped kids, I always spoke firmly to those (adults) who gawked at my kids that obviously had a problem.

I should speak for me as much.

[Kitty]

Good job - you and everyone else who posted here about speaking up. If we don't then who will?

I am SO tired of people who think that they are better than others.

Last time someone pushed me in order to get by I asked them (real loud) if they were born in a barn - 'cause they sure acted like it!! I got a dirty look but that's OK - I made my point. My Mom used to use that phrase all the time when we'd do something uncivilized - "were you born in a barn?"

I've become pretty thick skinned since being dx. I'll speak up now whereas before I wouldn't. I really don't care what the offending people think of me - they obviously don't care what people think of THEM.......

[Aarcyn]

I must admit I have always been the type to speak up when I saw people acting badly, long before MS.

And I am far from perfect because I must also admit that I was momentarily envious of the handicapped parking when it first appeared, especially at the mall at Christmas. I quickly realized its importance.

I wonder if it leaves an impression when we speak up. I know I feel better.

I know my daughter had gotten in between a bully and his victim when she was in the middle school cafeteria, verbally chased the mean girl at camp into a cabin when she brought the obese girl's underwear out in order for others to have a laugh.

She has seen me go after people and maybe, if we cannot change the inconsiderate oaf, we can learn to defend ourselves...if only for the benefit of lowering our own blood pressure!

[kicker]

I think you're right. We may not change the oaf (know it's not my job anyway), but we show our children to stand up for themselves and those weaker. My kids have never been bullied (as far as I know!) and aren't bullies themselves. At 16 they include "different" kids in their lives They look at us and do model behaviors they observe. They are not mean, but never play a victim's role either. they're good kids.

[SandyC]

Clapping hands loud and proud!!!!

[MelodyL]

I can practically guarantee that this man WILL NEVER DO THIS AGAIN!!!

You made him accountable. Good for you.

I also have helped blind people get to their destinations and whenever I see an elderly winded person stop in the middle of the street and they look like they are winded or something, I usually approach and say "are you okay?"

Most often, I get a smile and they say "yeah, just taking my time".

But once, (and this actually happened and Alan could not believe it), we were walking down the block (quite a few blocks from our home so I didn't know the gentleman I was trying to help).

The guy had two cane type of walkers. He really was having a problem and he was approaching the doorway to his home. Now I see that he has two walkers, so how is this guy going to open his front doors. There were two doors.

And because Alan walks slowly (he had the boot at the time), I just strode up to the front door of this apartment building, I held open the door and they guy started hitting me with the right cane walker thing.

Never in all my life did I expect this. He also cursed at me.

I just said "sorry", and walked away.

Alan wanted to belt him.

Probably the guy was having a bad day but really!!!!!

Oh, this morning I'm in Dunkin and I see this little thing walkinging across my path and she's holding on to her pushcart and I recognize her as my 99 year old neighbor. I said "Lily, what on earth are you doing here?" and she smiled brightly and said "hi, I need quarters, and I know I have to get in line".

So I said "no, you don't, I have quarters". So as I'm giving her change I asked "why do you need quarters?" and she goes "BECAUSE I'M TAKING THE BUS".


TAKING THE BUS???? SHE'S 99 YEARS OLD, WHERE IS SHE GOING ON A BUS???

Not knowing what to say or do (her daughter is 80 by the way and lives in Florida). I just said "well be careful and make sure they let you use the lift".

I don't think the bus allows you to use the lift unless you are using a wheelchair and she was not. She just walks (a bit crookedly) and she uses the pushcart to stablize herself.

BUT SHE'S GOING ON A BUS??? At 99 years old??

Holy Cow!!!!