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Old 09-05-2016, 10:38 AM #11
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at least he's getting great care now. what a perfect family to meet his needs.
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Old 09-07-2016, 12:29 PM #12
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I hope he continues to thrive now that he has a better family situation.

You are so good to your grands and they are very fortunate to have you, as is their mom. What a great support system she has. I think most of the time it makes all the difference for both kids and adults. Good support systems are extremely valuable.

Every year at this time I get antsy for fall to start. Oh, I know, we have another few months of the heat left to get through. This time of year I want to pull out my jeans and sweaters. I want to smell the crisp fall air. I miss those days as well as the summer days like what you described. NH is such a beautiful state and I have great memories of being in NH and living on the east coast in general. Your thread brings back so many great memories and since you posted this thread, I haven't stopped thinking about the grass, the trees, the fresh dewy air, the smells, picking berries, etc. Thank you for posting this thread.
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Old 09-09-2016, 02:08 AM #13
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Well, I might be a bit too good to the GBs. They both decided yesterday that they wanted to live with Nama. I asked them what about mommy, and they said that they could go and visit her sometimes. Adorable as all get out, but sadly mistaken about my ability to care for them 24/7. Of course some of that might have been the fact that I bought my GS a new bike yesterday, his old one was WAAAAAYYYYYY too small for him, so we went my mom drove us to the salvation army to donate it (and they were having a 99 cent sale so of course we went inside and bought even more clothes than what the kids need right now and a couple of books) and then headed to Walmart for his new bike.

My mom also picked them up horns for their bikes so we had a very noisy trip back to the house as the horns went off in the backseat. Somehow we made it without having an accident, ate lunch and then the kids spent the next hour or so out riding their bikes until it was time for "quiet time" during which even the GS fell asleep and actually stayed asleep longer than his sister. And after they woke up they rode their bikes for about another two hours before coming to announce their plan to move into Nama's house and just go visit mommy.

I wonder if that's a sign that I spoil them too much??? Or a sign that mommy doesn't spoil them enough? I mean I know she's severely lacking in rules for the kids, still doesn't quite have down "quiet time" for them and her food is well... not fast food but not great food either, lots of cans and boxes and not canned veggies and boxed pastas for the kids to eat either, but still an upgrade for the GS from what he had been eating with his father it seems. Whereas at Nama's house they gets lots of veggies, lots of fruit, some grains and protein. The GS also felt it important to announce that he "poops" better at Nama's house . While I would love to say "I don't want to know what the means..." Unfortunately I know that it means they aren't getting enough fiber when they're with mommy.

But anyways, in addition to their plans to just move into Nama's house, they also seem to think I need to go to NH more often, I shouldn't wait a whole YEAR before going again, they think next week or maybe the week after would be a great time to go. I even reminded them of the 20 hours in the car, and it taking two whole days to get there. The GS came up with a plan for that one too, we could take Nampa along and he could drive while Gigi sleeps, and then they could switch and he'd even wear pull-ups so we wouldn't have to stop so many times. He also thought that maybe we should just fly up there since that wouldn't take as long as driving because planes don't have roads that turn. Explained that it would take a lot of money for all of us to fly up there, so he decided that Nama and Gigi could just stay home and Ant Leannt as he calls her, could pick him and Zoe up from the plane, then it wouldn't cost so much. And if it still was going to cost too much "well maybe you could go to a bank and ask them to give you lots of money, then you would have enough money for all of us to go." (Providing I had a get away car and a fake I.D. to fly to NH until the 'heat' was off me. )

I tell ya the kid has ideas, not half bad little schemes if one could ignore reality for a bit, and his perchance for criminal acts in his schemes. But his little mind is furiously working away at figuring out how he's going to get back up to NH before a year is up, and both of them are trying to figure out what they have to do to move into Nama's house. They couldn't quite agree to never break the rules since as my GS pointed out... "well sometimes we just forget the rules, but sometimes... sometimes we will follow all the rules..." (not five minutes later he proceeded to leave the screen door open, push his sister and fight her to try and snatch away from her... hey sometimes they just forget the rules...). 24/7 of that... I don't think this body can handle it, cute as they are and remarkably well behaved given their ages and 10 month separation.
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Old 09-12-2016, 10:46 PM #14
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Need to love children sometimes... when everything else seems to be going awry they can keep you laughing. The GBs have started the fight on another front to live with Nama, apparently both of them decided to break into tears and tell their mother how much they missed me, and needed to see me (I saw them yesterday, not even 24 hours before their breakdown with mommy. We went out to dinner with the kids and my mother.) My DSD was apparently beside herself to console them over missing Nama, not realizing they were with me yesterday. Big crocodile tears and all, and she was worried right up until she promised they could see me soon and the GS perked right up and asked if they could live with me too?!

"What?!" Was the DSD response and the kids both told her that they wanted to live with Nama, but they'd still visit her. That made my day even when she called up with all of a mother's fury behind her wanting to know if I said her kids could live with me. Told her I didn't, and laughed, heartily over her predicament. Little scamps. But their mom isn't too happy with me right now over it, and I still just think it's too funny.

Because of course I told her to ask the kids why they want to live with Nama (I don't give them cookies, candy or ice cream unlike mommy) and she was rewarded with being told as I heard in the backround... "Nama has rules to keep us safe... Why don't you have rules mommy??? Nama also always has lots of good food, she wants us to grow up big and strong... Candy is okay mommy but it should only be a special treat, don't you know that mommy??? Nama also keeps our clothes nice and clean and makes sure we pick up our room so we don't lose our toys or break them, I guess we could do that here but when should we pick up our rooms mommy??? Nama also makes sure we have quiet time so we can give our heads a rest and make us really smart... Why don't we do that here mommy???"

I could barely contain my laughter at the GS speech over why Nama's house was better than with mommy. Especially since as she was hanging up on me I heard the all too funny poop statement from him but didn't get to hear if he questioned her as to why he doesn't poop easier with mommy. Now I swear, I have never once told the kids to question their mommy, have never discussed her parenting practice or lack thereof in front of the kids. I have only explained to them that I have rules to keep them safe, that no they can't eat candy allll the time they need real food to grow up big and strong, that quiet time is to rest their 'minds' he took it as head to help them get really smart, and when I tell them to clean up their toys, I tell them it's so they don't lose their toys or break them. I basically don't tell the kids to do anything or cease to do something without telling them the whys and wherefores.

So you can imagine how hard it was for me to keep my laughter to myself listening to the lisping innocent questions posed by a 4 year old to his mother, especially when you would think they would want to be with mommy more since she doesn't have much of anything for rules, gives the kids tons of junk food and pretty much anything goes, versus Nama's house where there are rules, and the rules will be followed or punishments will ensue. You don't get candy and junk food except for very rare occasions, you don't get to leave your room a mess or leave any place a mess in Nama's house. We clean up after ourselves here, even after eating the kids are expected to scrap their own plates into the trash and put them into the sink. Seems reasonable to me that a 3 and a 4 year old should be able to handle that. (granted sometimes food sticks and I have to rescrape them, I never have the kids come out and do it or anything, just so long as they get the basic behavior down...)

Aw well the DSD has a ways to go to learning the art of parenting, and what kids actually want from their parents. It's not all cakes and cookies and tons of toys. They want attention, and believe it or not, they want rules... Not randomly thrown out rules, but rules they can understand, and they want to know why those are the rules. The longer she denies them that, the longer she has to put up with the kids begging to move in with Nama
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Old 09-14-2016, 11:56 PM #15
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That's so typical of kids. Take it as a good sign. They both love you so much they want to live with you. If they lived with you, they would want to go live somewhere else.

Both of them sound so adorable. I love hearing your stories and adventures with the grands.
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