You sound like your very anxious....(understandable!) might sound random, but, do you have a dog? Do you have a friend with a calm dog? Sounds almost like PTSD almost in a way...just think about hanging out some with a pup that could be a good, calming influence. Match your breath with theirs, slow and steady as you fall asleep! If you wake up from a nightmare- just repeat. See how it goes!