I know my med file says BP I and II in different places, probably the admin people aren't sure of the difference like me. It is confusing. I have been manic several times, ER manic and my psychiatrist has not witnessed those episodes. I saw the duty psychiatrist in the ER. I am going to ask my doc when I see him Thur.

Sometimes I forget who I am now and I will sign up to do things that I used to love to do (host dinner parties for example) I will invite, plan meal and then wonder what the heck I am doing but it is too late and I have to follow through, having forgotten that I prefer to be home alone now w Trip. Also if I have people over there is a pretty good chance they will reciprocate in some fashion which is also a struggle. Last night in fact, I was invited to a new neighbors house. I had them over w a couple that knows me real well a couple months ago. It ruined my day I was so anxious about it all day. They said I could bring Trip, that helped.

Yesterday I replaced some of my potted plants-that is good of my soul. I went to yoga and for a run, as I couldn't sit still.

I wish I had a grocery like you Mari. My Costco people know how I am, I whip in there first thing in the AM and get out quick. I go weekly so no trip is too long. I would like to say I am saving money from not shopping in malls but I seem to do too well shopping on line--avoidance.

One more thing, my parents closed on the house that the three of us will move into this week. Now, I am independent but 100% disabled from the VA. My retirement is 01 Sept. I am anxious about it all. We are taking the first load of furniture out to the new house mid Aug. I look forward to having my folks there for me and me being there for them. I have the top floor of the house to myself but I am anxious about sorting my belongings to what I will need while I live there (indef) and what I will store. My space has always been super important to me, I need my nest, I really spend most of my time alone and I hope they respect that. It is huge but living in a much more rural environment will help me. That is just where I am today. I get my last military paycheck on the 15th then the VA kicks in(hopefully on time) and I am anxious about that too. Thank you guys.