Originally Posted by 94MTM

Hey all, figured I would share my story so maybe somebody could give me some insight or direction on what to do and things to do and also so maybe others can see similar symptoms of theirs to mine and get some relief I know it helps me some

So it started on August 11th I was playing flag football and during the game I took an elbow from a guy bigger guy about 250 I'm about 160, I didn't think too much of it at the time other than I had a massive headache, went home and still was just like its a massive headache no big deal, was kinda fatigued, tired ish, at some point my anxiety was starting to act up was able to get up splash some water in my face and that was that, a couple of hours later I tried going to sleep and then out of nowhere anxiety kicked in and was freaking out I didn't know what to do I had suicidial thoughts that I couldn't control, I didn't want to wake my mom up and scare her, finally I got myself some what calmed and was able to fall asleep.

The next 2 weeks I had depression and anxiety but each day it was getting better i didn't do too much except played video games ànd stayed inside watching tv, went to my cousins youth football practices and walked with my cousin and somedays lifted but around that 2 week mark I started feeling great kind of like my old self again so I decided I was gonna go play flag again, well bad idea I took a couple elbows to face and a knee to neck (not going to explain that one lol) I had headaches again and had nausea drove home and told my m and she said let's go to the doctor went to the ER and had a CT scan done it came back clean but I failed all other concussion tests they did, they told me I had PCS, and to follow up with my regular doctor

That Tuesday I went to the doctor he did your normal eye test pupil thing, he told me he believed I received a concussion the first game and 2nd game along with PCS, he told me to take it easy and get some rest and it would get better in a couple of weeks

About a week after that I ended back up in the ER because I had ecru emery strong suicidial thoughts, they brought in a counselor and she said she believed I didn't have any mental illnesses and that TBI/Concussions were newer to her she said that she did do some research and said I was common for frontal lobe injuries to cause these kind of things and they sent me on he way the ER doctor told me just to take my temazepam through the day and come back in situations like this and to follow up with regular doctor

Finally got into the doctor yesterday now he told me this was going to be a long healing process now and he prescribed me lorazepam (Atavin) for my anxiety, told me it was okay to walk and lift but not to run that he didnt want any jaring of the head and he scheduled me a meeting with a neurologist (October 8th) and meet back with him on October 5th

My symptoms are:
Headaches, generally all day usually no less than a 4 on a scale 1-10
Fatigued easily
Concentration loss
When I read for a bit it seems like the words all come together and it's hard to make out what it was
Sometimes I get these purple spots in my sight not too much though
Depressed
Anxiety
Loss of appetite (Atavin has helped)
Disturbed sleep patterns, difficulty sleeping
I'm slow to do things
Short term memory loss
And even long term memory loss it seems like its hard for me to remember stuff about times I would normally remember
Have no motivation a lot if times
Cry a lot and easily use to never cry
Mood swings
Irritable
Sometimes I get these energy increases like I'm back to my old self and do things
Tremors
Weakness in the legs sometime/balance issues like if I'm trying to put jeans on I kinda fall over
But the one that bothers most is suicidial thoughts and ideation it's like I can't get it out of my head I've never been suicidial except once and that was when I smoked pot with a friend and once I was done being high I didn't want anything to do with being suicidial and was able to forgot about but these are like hey remember when you thought about it and hey I haven't thought about it for so and so long, I don want to be suicidial it's just there

Somedays are really great then the next days its like bam worst day ever I'm not used to it I used to enjoy everyday so much before hand pretty much no downs and was a bright side to every down now I'm kinda pessimistic like this isn't too to get better but then at times I'm positive saying I'm gonna get through this I'm gonna live more than just a normal life I'm gonna graduate college get a good job and have a family

My anxiety is so high that I find myself googling symptoms and scaring myself that I have it

I'm 19 and was leaving for the Air Force and now I'm at home with no plans possibly going to college next semester and starting work here soon like maybe 16 hours a week something to help with the anxiety and depression because sitting here letting my thoughts wander isn't helping

I'm kind of looking for guidance like what should I do, what shouldn't I do, what should I eat drink and stuff like that things to stay away

This is the hardest thing I've ever gone through especially with the up and down moods like the whole I'm happy and cherry then bam it's ripped away from I could be perfectly content with all these physical symptoms I just want to be back to my old self the happy cheery me the one that was family orientated outgoing and fun now I'm this highly anxious nervous 19 year old

Sorry for the length of the post it's just I'm lost and looking for some guidance, hope, thanks to all and if any who respond