I don't have a doctor to talk to them about this issue. I just was approved ssdi and medicaid the other day. So I am waiting to be accepted to a doctor.

I fear it has progressed to a dangerous point as recently, I have been choking on my saliva in my sleep which has been scary to wake up to.. choking coughing and can barely breathe.

I have a lesion in my brainstem which is what I am assuming is causing this issue.

It's somewhat heartbreaking... The brainstem is the place I have feared most to get a lesion in... and of course, I got it. It's relatively big too

I am also thinking the brainstem lesion is what causes those horrible episodes in my sleep.. I think that I stop breathing or my heart stops functioning, i dunno something really bad is happening in my system when I have those episodes.. they even cause my pupils to get all goofy (one really big and one really small)

I'm a mess. and I feel so bad because I scare the poop out of my boyfriend all the time.. choking, falling, severly impaired speech and walk. Geesh, why is that guy even still in the picture? CUZ IM ONE SUPER LUCKY GAL! lol

I'm usually pretty good about taking a drink, holding it in my mouth until IU know that it will go where it needs to (just because its happened so many times now) I just had no control where the coffee was being directed..

Another reason to hate MS-- I am my biggest threat to myself.