Hi there,

It seems obvious that you should not be playing roller derby, but I can understand your hesitation. You feel good for the most part, playing roller derby is what you love to do, and you don't want to have to deal with however your teammates respond (because it's not going to feel great to go through that). I think these are all really good reasons to hesitate.

A few things you can consider:

1. The obvious risks of getting another concussion, sub-concussions, or a setback is something that you don't want in your life.

2. There are other activities that can be similarly fulfilling but in a different way; you'll have to find them. If it's possible, you can still participate somehow in roller derby culture, but find a different way to participate that doesn't put you at risk (For instance, organizing or doing some function at practice or game nights).

3. Be honest with your teammates. You could find that being honest is a way to respect yourself and your situation, and a way to find out how your friends respond. It can bring you closer to some, distant to others, and maybe surprise you because there might be a person or two who you didn't expect to understand. It'll probably be an enlightening experience.

So my humble suggestion is to honor your hesitation (know and be angry that you're situation is unfortunate) but then move on and feel great about making the right decision for yourself. Then, with your happy healthy brain and empowered self, watch as the pieces fall where they need to.

VB