I see the stress in my husbands eyes sometimes too Vrae. It makes me feel so guilty. He never wants to tell me he's stressed because he doesn't want me to get upset, so he tries to carry the brunt of everything by himself like my illness, his diabetes, medical bills, college tuition, etc. He drives me to every dr appt, since I don't drive anymore, even when it's in NY. He works a full time job and several part time jobs and in between them he drives me to drs appts and the pharmay to pick up prescriptions. He will take me out to local restaurants to get me out a little to lift my spirits. He was one of the people who said maybe loosing weight and exercising more would help ease the pain of rsd. He knows it won't take the pain away, but he knows rsd attacks my weak areas which are mainly my hands and feet. I know he was just trying to help. My pm dr though told me the last two times I saw him, to exercise more, when I told him the rsd was spreading to my feet and my other hand and wrist. I felt like he was trying to help, but also felt that my dr could have offered more options to contain the spread. He didn't and when I see him next week I will talk to him about this.
I know it's hard Vrae to see the stress on your husband, but try not to feel guilty. Bram is right. For better or worse and it's not your fault that this happened to you. I know I feel guilty too sometimes, but know I would do the same for him if this situation was reversed. It's also hard on the kids too, I know, but families are with us to help each other through the hard times and it sounds like that's exactly what yours is doing for you. You are very lucky. I am lucky too to have such a supportive husband and son. I feel bad because I flew off the handle last night when my husband and brother both suggested exercise and loosing weight. I know they meant well, and I am trying to walk more. It does help a little. I just didn't feel that great and took it the wrong way. I do have to say though, when a cancer patient says they don't feel well, to people tell them to exercise and loose weight? Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't think so. Anyway, hope you have a better day today everyone. From your fat out of shape menopausal rsd friend, Renee.