Sparky and Kitty,
It seems that others feeling helpless and even angry, often turn out to be very true.

I know that when my late husband and I got together and I eventually told him that I had MS, that he had little idea what that could mean with respect to our future. I was in remission then and he said that he was perfectly fine with the potentials when I explained it to him.

A couple of years after we were married, I went into a major flare to the point where I needed two crutches and assistance to get dressed.
One night, he crawled into bed, snuggled up to me and whispered into my ear "I know that you are scared, but you need to know that I am too..."

It was one of the sweetest times that we had together. We accepted each other's feelings and learned to talk about them that night.
I learned that his emotions troubled him and that he did feel helpless.

Him revealing his fears and his sense of helplessness opened the door for me to care for his emotional needs, and that made me feel good.
Even though the body was going through its thing, loving and caring about him gave me a sense of purpose, when most other things did not.
It gave me the strength to allow maintaining my Independence to be less important, and I encouraged him to help me do things like get dressed, bathe and even walk. That gave him a stronger sense of love and purpose in return.

Over the years I have had friendships dwindle away, family members become distant and acquaintances outright avoid me. I know that it is not because of something offensive that I have done, but is due to their own emotions and their not wanting to feel them.

Some have come to understand and work with that, and we have resumed contact with each other. With others, I hope and pray that they eventually will so as to alleviate their own suffering, but in the mean time, I take comfort in knowing that there are many (like all of those here), who can and will extend companionship and support, despite their fears, sadness, anger and sense of helplessness.

KittyLady, I wish, hope and pray that a friend comes your way who has the strength to accept their emotions; who does not feel the need to suppress them, but instead allows, shares and maybe even celebrates them for what they are...that which makes a well rounded, compassionate and loving human being

With love, Erika