Alffe,

My heart goes out to you...My mother has attempted suicide multiple times, so I can relate on some level...but I cannot imagine the pain of losing a child...It warms my heart so much, being a singer and writer myself, that my great grandmothers words have impacted you in such a healing manner......I myself have suffered with addiction through the last 4-5 years, and I've been going through some extremely rough times, but recently heard a song that completely changed my outlook...it is called "Don't Give Up You're On The Brink Of A Miracle" - such a positive song and certainly reached me at my ultimate 'bottom' moment...Tammy Faye Bakker often sang the song, but if you can look past the silly outfits and such, the words are very poignant - and clips of the song can be found on YouTube. I hope your Christmas is most blessed this year, and know that just because you can't see around the corner doesn't mean that a miracle isn't waiting right there for you...I pray that this new year you will experience a time of "wholeness" where there's nothing missing, nothing broken....fullness of joy....

Merry Christmas,
Brett Boyd