I really feel for you Wendy, I wish it was an easy question to answer. I know that writing has been a wonderful thing for me so I don't feel as useless as I used to. I do understand that feeling though, although I've been disabled for a lot longer then I've had a BP II dx. My disability is physical and so I have a whole slew of issues stemming from my physical limitations. I am glad I don't have to work though to be honest, I wouldn't be able to concetrate with all the pain I am in you know? It's pretty bad some days and I just wish I could lay in bed all day but I can't. How much of that is the BP and how much is just depression related to pain I don't know.

BUt the point is I do understand. There are no easy answers, but you have to ask yourself, what do you see yourself doing ten years from now? Do you expect to still be on disability and all? I do, although I could see myself in the middle of a writing career, so I don't think it will always be so doom and gloomy for us, I think I can write our way out of this paper bag we've been stuck in for so long. It's so hard to make it on what you get from SSDI, and SSI. I know it's hard, but working isn't an easy answer for many people because pain or depression really interfere with the ability to focus at a job and can make it impossible to enjoy the job itself.

I hope you can move into a better place, I know how exciting it is for our family to have this big move ahead. It's a low income place and it's been hard trying to go through the application process but in the end I think it will be worth it. I hope that you can move into a better place, hang in there, it can happen.