I understand. Although I still love the holidays, this year it has been a little too much. I made it to Christmas and was caught up with the baking, sewing, and cooking, but when I had planned to rest for a while afterwards my daughter and her family came back to stay for four days in the middle of which I fell and hurt myself slightly. Needless to say this is not the peaceful Christmas week I envisioned on the 24th when I surveyed the tree, neatly wrapped packages, and stacks of cookies.
My husband and sons feel like my daughter gets all my attention, my son in law feels like he can just sit quietly and read while we entertain his wife and toddler and provide three meals daily, and I feel caught in the middle of all their expectations, disappointing everyone including myself while my new books and yarns sit neglected under the tree.
I thought that once my mother died I would be free of trying to meet unrealistic expectations. Nope.
I have my regular New Year's party tomorrow for two other large families. It is easy because everything is store bought, no homemade pressures. My husband, however, is fuming at the expense and effort since he had to shop while I try to rest as much as possible. He is totally ruining the fun, even though I don't think he means to, we can afford it. He is just in a curmudgeonly mood because of our daughter's extended visit. Tomorrow is a holy day of obligation and he wants to fight about that.
I really didn't hurt myself all that badly but I can feel the muscles in my back tightening up after our last "discussion". I definitely think stress makes the pain much worse.
Everyone needs to vent sometime!