I saw the Neurologist on Monday and he said it's ET. I cannot take any of the meds used for this because of other meds I take. There may be another beta blocker, but I already take Norvasc and there is a serious interaction with that and my other meds. I also have a mood disorder and take meds for that and I don't want to feel drugged up which is what it would probably do to me. I'm very sensitive to any medicines and it always effects my fibromyalgia when I take anything new. I'm at my wits end!!! My doctor is sending me for a functional capacity test and hopefully that will help with my appeal to SSI. I know I have to learn to live with this, but I feel I have lost my purpose in life. I can't work. I am barely hanging on financially. I would be ashamed to have anyone in my home because I can't keep up on the cleaning, laundry, dishes, etc. It's like being stuck in purgatory! I can't go back, but I can't move forward either. I'm becoming more and more depressed. I have no money for gas so I can't even go visit my Dad on the other side of town. I used to go to the thrift stores with my friend just to get out and look and walk. The only reason I leave now is if I have an appointment or to get groceries. Being backed into a corner is the worst thing for me because I'm either going to wallow there in my depression or become manic out of fear and lash out at everyone around me. I'm so afraid of completely losing it and ending up in the hospital! That is one of my greatest fears, being somewhere that someone else has control of my every move and my meds too, but there are days that I get so bad lately that I don't take care of myself. Just taking a shower is a drawn out process now and I'm lucky to get in there twice a week. Brushing my teeth is taking me ten or fifteen minutes depending on the tremors. Sometimes I just wish the Lord would take me home.