I think both effects happen - moosey and st George are both right. People pull away because they can't deal with it and get fed up with having to fit our new circumstances into their life (they liked the old me lol, but the new me is too complicated and not as much fun ).

We pull back from people because we hate to stand out, but blending in is hard work, and hiding the pain to make others feel more comfortable just doesn't seem fair all the time. Plus we are scared of something happening when we are out, scared of making a scene, or having someone tread on a foot in a busy place, etc. so many things to think of now....staying in is easier. Sad but true.

I'm fed up with my four walls....I go out for lunch with a friend sometimes, but my relationships with them have definitely changed and we aren't as close. They have to be a really good friend to stay very close when you change, or become so unreliable and have so many bad days. And we all need to let those feelings and fears out....it's easy to scare away someone you thought was close enough to deal with it. I did that in the early days, broke down with a close friend and we talked about it for hours, she was asking questions and it was good to talk it all through. But it changed things and hasn't been the same since. Very sad

I'm careful with the friends I have now not to show too much or ask much of them. Disappointing though, and hard not to feel let down. Would I have been the same if it were the other way around??? Hard to know honestly, maybe I would. I hope not though.

Take care everyone, and thank you for being the ones who I can say this stuff to. Always appreciated

Bram