Quote:
Originally Posted by PamelaJune
I feel in my mind I should be happy they say they have found something. Instead, I'm shattered, it's 6.55pm and I'm getting into bed already. I cooked an early dinner, basic meat and 4 veg, couldn't face anything more energetic. Did the animals and garden watering. Got the sewing machine out to make a birthday gift for my sister, money to tight to buy anything but I have materials here and if I can get the energy right I can create a nice gift I hope. Just so shattered, still reeling from my vitriolic sisters in law comments and keep telling myself to put it behind me. I'd rather give them a piece of my mind but I will not lower myself to their level. I'm turning the other cheek and being strong, if my grandma could do it, so can I. Nasty vitriolic people are not welcome in my life anymore. Be gone you horrid things, I'm singing my song I get knocked down but I get up again.... Sorry felling down and shattered, know you NT'rs understand, we are all in a tough place right now. Pulling on my big girl soldier pants right now and putting my thoughts in order. Love to you all  |
Pam,
when I am shattered ...I retreat to my garden....cuddle my pets...and also sew....things to me like that are meditative...my mind slows...I find my center...innately you nurtured yourself...good job!!
Do hand make that gift for your sister....your creation will be so treasured...trust me on that...
To help myself when I had evil thoughts about my family who abandoned me......soon as they entered my head I caught the thought and said my favorite prayer...then after about a week of plenty of praying ...I could say a short prayer and I love you...(because that did not change) and now it does not hurt near as bad. I feel compassion for them although I will never be with any of them without a therapist between us.
I am so sorry you have been hurt on that level...it is deep pain just not needed to be piled on us..... go easy on yourself.
HB