Wow that's hard, I'm so sorry you're dealing with this on top of all the other worries that come when your loved one has CRPS...

I can understand your frustration and anger. It must be hard enough seeing this happening, but when she can't see it herself and is reading bad things into her view of what's happening....well, it must feel like you can't do right for doing wrong.

I would suggest going to stay with her parents or someone she trusts for a few days, so that they can see it for themselves. If other people are seeing it too and corroborating what you say then she hopefully might not feel that it's some conspiracy, and you can then ask the doctor about it and maybe set up some kind of session with a counsellor. I'd do the counsellor thing anyway, it is very helpful to have that third person involved and making sure that the discussions about what's going on are productive and positive, rather than negative.

Or...ask a friend of hers, someone she trusts, to come and stay for a few days, for the same reason. They could maybe sleep in the same room as your wife while you get some sleep for work. Again, if other people than yourself are experiencing what's going on, you can sit her down and help her to gently realise that this is a new thing that needs to be addressed. It might be meds related, it might not, but until she can acknowledge that things have changed its going to be hard to get it treated. In the meantime, you could ask to see her doctor to tell them what's happening and ask for advice. They won't be able to tell you anything too concrete because of the whole patient confidentiality thing, but they need to know about this, and should be able to advise you and suggest a course of action.

Good luck, and let us know how you both get on with this. For yourself, try to make some time for naps away from home, even just for an hour or so, to help you get through the days. Also practice deep breathing exercises (breathe in slowly through your nose, right to your boots, and then exhale slowly through your mouth counting silently to five) to gain some calmness and reduce the frustration. You could maybe try getting your wife to join in as a joint exercise for you both. Us wives like to feel our husbands are involved in these little things

You're doing a good job there. Keep going and try to keep calm with her, even though it must be driving you crazy... It's got to be a very scary time for her, and I'm sure she will feel very guilty when she does realise what's going on. You will need to give her lots of reassurance that it's not her fault and that things will be ok. This is a scary enough disease anyway, without bringing stuff like this into the room...

Take care of you both.

Bram.