Just to let y'all know, I cleaned and cleaned, I took to it with a vengeance and it took me over 6 hours. I'm paying for it today and even now sitting here I can see things I still want to do, you know the cobwebs in the corner behind the door of the back loo for example. Why is it we can always do a better job of it than when a cleaner comes in and does it?
I cancelled the cleaner mum had arranged for me, at $120 a week I just didn't see her as doing to things I wanted done and yes it was lovely for the month of February but I still could see what wasn't done and tbh $120 is money we just cannot afford. My mum is still trying to get her head around the fact that while before we were the bank of P&L where all family members came to us for handouts financially and emotionally we are closed. We just don't have the money for these things anymore. I haven't been to the hairdresser since September last year, I haven't spent a penny on myself other than food and medication since September.
The new fortnightly "date nights" we've done twice now and I recycled old outfits, steamed and pressed them and they came up a treat. But I felt so guilty for the money spent. I took mum home after dinner last night and bless her, she said she felt guilty she goes to the hairdresser once a week and I can't afford to go at all, it's been a shock to her, she picked up my medication from the pharmacy last month and was stunned to see the bill was $300. It's all starting to finally hit home, her youngest daughter who has always been the strong one, the one she relied on to get them out of the financial hole the older daughter put them in is not what she once was. She can finally see I'm broken. It's been a rude shock.
So today, I'm paying, paying paying, I'm walking in agony and the worst of it all is I'm expected to go out tonight. I've got the footy tomorrow which I'm Looking forward to and the trip to Pemberton also looking forward to on Tuesday, but tonight, nope, not looking forward. Oh well out with the big girl soldier pants, ends must lol. On a good note, the house is clean and I'm feeling house proud yay me...