@Vrea sorry didn't see your second post.... nm
I want to tell you a little about my mom so maybe it could help you understand how your daughter might feel from a more inside perspective.

My mom (step-mom but she was mom) died in the spring of 2009 I was 22. Around 11 I noticed something was wrong with her but no one talked to me. She had broken her back at work and worked with a broken back for over two weeks. she was a surgery room nurse, the doctor during surgery asked her to stand in the door way so he could get some air , I still don't know why he asked but he did. Those doors are electric programed to close at 90mph too keep contaminants out the handle caught her in her lower back. even after corrective surgery she was in agony every day.(not to mention my father broke his a year later) we all adapted. Three years later she came back from what should have been a quick shopping trip and collapsed, we all had seen she was losing weight and fast but she kept telling us she was okay. She wasn't she had a ulcer that the surgeon was able to put two fingers through. She died twice in the surgery room and once in the ICU bed in front of me, but she made it.
Looking back on it now I know all my cheerful fronts and blank pain face I got from her, because that is exactly what she used to do. I wish she had let me help her more, I wish she had not stressed about how it was effecting me because almost losing her effected me a whole lot more. I wished she had talked to me about the emotional side of it, the frustration the self anger the self doubt. At the very least I wish she had been honest with me about how bad it was. Maybe it would have prepared me for what happened to me not that any of us wish this... this... demon on our children.
Because she wasn't honest with me I left town for a year at twenty not knowing every second was so very precious. Eventually because life can be cruel and kind at the same time I came back, found a little apartment and spend not nearly enough time with her, I was back in town for eight months before she died.
The weekend prior had been mothers day, she finally saw my apartment , I took her to the movies and dinner. I was the last one who spoke with her , she asked me to bring a watermellon when I came over Monday after classes she died Friday night alone, probably scared, and fighting for every breath. She died from a genetic form of COPD , her body just became too weak to fight anymore.At first I thought i was angry at her from lying and leaving but I was really angry at myself for being so blind. We as the child think our parents are invincible at least until their 60 or so, life doesn't work that way. The guilt still eats at me nearly every day.

What I was hoping you would get from this is don't hide it, don't play false happy all the time talk to her without guilt be honest because yes she may be your child and she needs to be protected from somethings but this isnt one of them this is your life everyday. She will be scared but she will also cherish every moment with you.