Erin - So sorry to hear about your dad. He needs to be seen as soon as possible. Yikes!

Also, are you on Medicare or do you have a private insurance company?

As for Lupus, there are a bunch of tests for it. Believe me, I've had them all and apparently do have Lupus in addition to MS. From what I understand, you can have a negative ANA test and still have Lupus. I've only had one positive ANA and one positive anti-DS but not at the same time. It's one of those tricky diseases. Apparently, I also have Sjogren's too, another AI disease. I do not get a rash across my face and not all people with Lupus get that rash. According to the rheumatologist I saw, the Lupus I have is only affecting my joints. I was going to get a 2nd opinion but ended up having emergency surgery instead. So, discuss the rash with your PCP and go from there. Further testing may need to be done and Lupus may be the reason that you have been feeling poorly, in addition to all the other things you have going on with your life.

Given your parent's health status, finding ways to be independent is so important for you. If you can't get the hand controls right now, see if there is some sort of transportation for people with disabilities in your area so that you can get to places on your own without having to depend on your dad. He is not in good health from what you have stated and you shouldn't depend on him. Additionally, find ways to help your parents out as they need that right now. While you are their daughter and they love you, they need someone to take care of them right now and not them taking care of someone else.