Hi Rialynn, I'm sorry you are suffering with rsd. You are so young too. I felt isolated and alone and shell shocked when I first got it. I was afraid to walk outside with my dog or even down the stairs for fear of falling and causing spread. I am still very careful trying not to fall but have learned to work through my fears with my psychiatrist and some good shoes with good traction on them was well as yak traks in the winter months. I still get nervous, but can't stay in the house and be afraid to move. So yes, I feel the same way you do. It's like the grieving process. You go through anger, bargaining, denial, depression and then acceptance. Well, at least something like that. My therapist told me about this. It takes time to accept that your life you planned to have has significantly changed and time to be able to cope with the medical bills that pile up. But you will see a light at the end of the tunnel in time and though it may show a different life then you planned at the other end of the tunnel, it will still be a good life and make you a stronger person for it. I go by the old motto One Day at a Time because RSD changes every day and there's research being done to find a cure so that's good. Having made friends on this forum have helped me to feel less isolated and alone and I've learned alot about myself and what others are going through and also about new procedures that help some people with rsd which gives me hope, like with Tessa. She's tried something that is helping her and has given me hope again. So try to take it a day at a time and know that you are not alone. I am always here if you need a friend as well as everyone else here. The people here are all awesome and a great support system.
As for the high heels, I used to love them, but now I wear flats only. But I wear Clarks shoes and I love them. They are very comfortable and stylish. They are my little secret addiction. I love love love Clarks shoes. Anyway, try to not stress though it's hard at times. Stress causes rsd to flare and you don't want that. I will pray that you will feel better soon both emotionally and physically. From your friend, Renee.