Oh god, a man who not only cooks but cuts up meat into cubes and knows how to make kabobs!! My Alan wouldn't know his way around a kabob if you shot him!!!!

And you have a GARDEN. And you can grow Beefsteak Tomatoes?? Oh, I'm so jealous, I could spit (but that wouldn't be ladylike).

Oh I have to tell you what happened last night. I have 3 windows that face out into the street. On the window sills of these windows I have lovely chinese vases in which I put fake flower arrangements. Looks really pretty as a person passes in front of my home and they look up and see the pretty flower arrangements and the beautiful chinese vases. I got them for $5.99 in the dollar store and believe me, they look expensive.

So my husband, every night before he goes to bed, checks that all windows are closed, locked, etc. I have told him OVER AND OVER, don't close the window over the flowers. They'll crumple and you might knock over the vase. And since I'm the one who usually closes the windows, my vases have been safe.

UNTIL LAST NIGHT!!!

I went to bed (11:00 p.m) AND FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A LONG TIME, I DIDN'T TAKE MY ALPRAZOLAM. I had said "oh good, tonight you don't have to rely on a pill to get you to sleep. So I was drifting off into la la land, when all of a sudden, I hear this yell from the Living Room. I groggily get out of bed saying out loud "for crying out loud, I was sleeping", and Alan is responding "I have neuropathy, I can't move, I can't walk". What do I think?? His legs gave way and he couldn't walk". I immediately woke up and said "what, you can't walk???? what??? what??. I walk into the living room, and there's Alan, standing stock still, in the middle of my broken chinese vase, and he's YELLING AT ME TELLING ME "didn't I tell you, you can't trust me to close this window, didn't I tell you I would knock over the vase, that I can't see in the dark when I close the window".

I didn't move a muscle. I simply said "there's a light switch directly to your left, why didn't you turn on the light when you had to close the window. Why are you such a MOOSE when it comes to closing windows??"

He just stood there saying "but, but but, I told you I can't close windows if you have vases in the window sill, I'm too clumsy".

I said "no, you arent' clumsy, you are clueless because you just went over and with your two big hands, you just closed the window over the flowers, and knocked the vase off. It has nothing to do with ME!!!! You should have turned on the light, opened the verticals, moved the vase, AND CLOSED THE WINDOW. That's how I did it every night".

So he's yelling at me that it's all my fault. So there I was, getting my broom, carefully cleaning up around him because he's yelling at me "I have neuropathy, I'm not moving until all the little pieces of the vase are removed".

I wanted to take the broom and swat him one.

So after we finish, he goes into the bathroom and starts yelling "you left the water running in the bathtub, WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES NOW DON'T WE"???

We laughed our heads off. That's why we've been married for 27 years.

I don't take crap from him and he overlooks my leaving the water running.

lol Melody