Hi,

I am afraid I won't make much sense as this as yet undiagnosed brain pressure/seizures/pain are causing my cognitive skills to deteriorate daily...so I apologise in advance.

I suffer with PTSD and was also in a very violent relationship for 5 years where my head was constantly being hit or banged into walls etc...because of the PTSD and MH issues (started at 7 years old) I used to repeatedly bang my head onto anything hard, resulting in black eyes and seizure. So, I do realise this is caused by self induced injury possibly...

But for some reason the symptoms have only shown themselves in the last six months...possibly delayed damage?

I have constant spine pain, muscle, joint, numbness, sporadic paralysis on the right side of my body, I have 'burning brain' which flows to the top of my spine, it used to last seconds but now is there 99% of the time. About six months ago I could feel my brain moving or swelling, I told a mh worker instead of anyone medical because I have found being labelled with mh issues everything seems to be put down to anxiety. So I didn't go to my gp. But then I started to get so many symptoms...too many to list...around 20 or so symptoms.

Apparently I had a seizure two years ago of which I have no recollection. In January this year I was at breaking point and ran into a disused prison metal gate purposely to self injure my head, I didn't realise the damage I was doing...police arrived and I had a seizure whilst with them. Then this Saturday I had three seizures in 15 minutes, was taken to hospital but self discharged after 3 days as the two consultants were arguing over treatment and they abruptly stopped the benzodiazapines I am on and I could not cope mentally.

They have arranged a mri, ct scan, eeg, 24 hour heart monitor and a renal investigation. They said my folic acid and potassium was far too low but they left the cannula when it had dislodged and the potassium wass not going into me, my blood was coming out of my arm and into the tube instead. They then had an argument about that and that is when I self discharged. My gp arranged blood tests the very next day and both renal and potassium were fine??

I have no idea what is going on (apart from if there is brain damage - I caused it, feel so awful) and I do not know what they are looking for...there are so many medics now involved that I am getting such conflicting opinions from them all.

I really thought originally it was Fibromialgia but have been tested and it is not.

I am sorry for the long post...I just wondered if anyone could enlighten me at all? I am meant to be making phone calls but cannot get my words out properly and am failing at so much. My short-term memory is about two seconds long and my personality has changed, I am starting to dislike/like things I didn't and behaving differently. I know this is all my fault, and I have stopped banging my head...I just feel like sitting here and sobbing because everything feels and is so wrong.

I am 38 if that makes any difference.

Thank you if you have got this far into my probably waffly post and again I am sorry that this is possibly self induced, it was just my way of coping, ironically.