Smiling eyes,

Just had this conversation with husband last night.

He has gotten all my folders of pictures on one laptop finally. I have thousands and they are all organized but were spread among four laptops.

As we looked through them I realized how different even my vibrancy is. I look so happy, confident, put together...now I struggle to dry my hair.

I does hit me at times. I want my old self back for me badly, and for my daughter. My husband is thankful I've come this far and I didn't pass from the accident.

I'm still left wanting more. Not to work 50-60 hours a week life before, but to be sure of me, confident, at home in this new skin, able to be in public more, think and respond faster, drive-not far, just around town, and have ME time. Be with my family on outings, sports events, hikes, mountain climbing, swimming, playing, singing and dancing, cooking by myself, cleaning my house from top to bottom (May sound strange but it's soothing for me), reading.

It's really like changing a lot of who you have been and making a new life.

Smilin, I understand, and I am extremely thankful to have you and others to confide in and celebrate, commiserate, and just Be among as I am.

Months ago I read a post for a more elder member and she said she needed a break from here. She thought emotionally it kept her in a certain frame of mind. I don't remember her words exactly, but I thought I should do the same and she if I am any different.

Nope. I wasn't more positive or less focused on what's happening or more. I missed the companionship and feeling that people 'get' me.

I am going through stages on acceptance about all this I guess. I'm farther along than I the first few months, but as everyone says, this is a long path I'm hiking. I have no idea where I'll end up.

PM me if you want to chat.

Peace and wellness,

Jace