Your post really and truly brought tears to my eyes.

I left management consulting and pursued my phd and teaching career in order to have a career to feel more engaged and more fulfilled. The students were so wonderful and there were so many interesting and kind people I met and learned from along the way.

I also talked to the accommodations people at the university today. She couldn't come up with anything other than a tool (i.e. an iPad or an audiobook). I told her I would ask my doctor at Berkeley for her suggestions. I suspect I am also where you are.

There is no mourning period more painful than the one you are entering. It is not one entered by choice.

I'm so sorry- It's one of those brutal transition periods. I've heard of post-traumatic growth--but it somehow seems to undermine the pain of having to move from a place that has given you so much joy.

The only solace I have found is in the hugs of my family. Simple and profound. Your husband sounds like such a soul.

Do mourn. Do be angry. Do take pride in the many of children you did get to reach along the way. Do know that there will be a tomorrow. Until then,
do be kind to yourself.