Hi
Welcome, your story like many others sounds familiar while portions may be better and portions may be worse then mine. I do recogniE myself in your story. I to work in healthcare and it is extremely depressing to loose your job, your friends and your life as you know it.
I don't know if your religious at all? But god as helped me get through this. To understand that my life is not my plan but his. And his plan is not to let us suffer. So with that said, I believe we met here for a reason just as we meet others on the street for a reason.
Look around the room, use the search feature, ask questions, rant rave we are all friends and for most of us this group is the only safe place where understanding of our disease comes from.
Gentle hugs!