I'm so glad you posted. You need support, and this is a good place to find it. Friends and family want to help, of course, but really don't know what you're going through. They feel frustrated and helpless and don't know what to do.

It's natural for you to be feeling angry and depressed about things. You need a healthy way to express those feelings, though, and have gotten some good suggestions from this thread. You don't say what part of the country you are in, but are you near a teaching hospital? That might be a good place to look for a support group and/or a "Pain Psychologist" to help you through this. They may even have a Pain Clinic…

Hopefully, your attorney has gotten WC approval for some pain meds for you by now. If not, start making some noise! It is ridiculous for those to be denied. You may need a long-acting and a short-acting opioid for the pain, an rx for nerve pain (like an anti-convulsant or even some of the anti-depressants are good for this), a muscle relaxant (Flexeril or Zanaflex), something to help you sleep (amitriptyline or trazodone), etc. Ask your doc for a referral to a Pain Management Specialist. It's no wonder you're down in the dumps, with no meds on board!

A lot of us have been right where you are, believe me. Your feelings are valid and I know it's hard to fight the negative self-talk. Try putting a limit on the self-pity you may be feeling - give yourself say, 15 minutes a day for this, then move on to something more productive. You didn't ask for this and it must feel so unfair that it is hitting you this young. And don't feel guilty - even suicidal ideation is perfectly natural when we get hit with stuff like this. The key is to not get "stuck." (Easier said than done, I know!)

You're not alone. My hope for you is that with a good treatment team (neurologist, pain psychologist, pain management specialist, physiatrist, PT, bodyworker, etc.), the right meds, restful sleep, some healthy activities to keep you distracted from the pain, and lots of support from your loved ones and fellow TOSers, things will start to look brighter.

Remember, this is a process and not an event. It might take some time to get the medical stuff going. It can be frustrating in the beginning, but you've got to keep on keeping on, as they say. I wish you the best and hope you will keep posting on the TOS forum. There is a lot of knowledge and a ton of experience for you to draw from on here.

Hope you are feeling better today. I know how overwhelming it can be to fight the TOS monster. But fight we must! And helping each other through can be an important part of the solution.

Take care,
Alison