On July 28, I had my first ever seizure at age 38 and it has really screwed me up. I was playing a video game with my daughter and that is the last memory I have. I have no visual memories of what happened at that time, just infrequent audio memories. Apparently I started seizing and "slobbering" and my husband after hearing my daughter screaming and realized that I wasn't playing and had turned blue called 911. At some point I became almost combative and he said that my eyes were wide open and started grabbing/hitting his legs. I don't recall any of this. I do recall hearing his voice telling me that I was having a seizure. The next memory I have is the paramedics telling me they were going to give me oxygen...still no visual. They took my vitals twice, poked me for blood glucose (which was normal) and apparently asked me questions and I responded. I told gave them my mothers name (I have no clue why) and when they asked who my husband was, I gave a name that was not his...Gabriel? I have no sort of recall for any of this (which I would expect to be normal, I don't know). I do vividly remember, and I know this will sound crazy...watching one of the EMT's roll the gurney into my house, I described the EMT to my daughter and she confirmed it was him. The gurney was bright yellow and had an oxygen cylinder on the bottom that had two bright green reflective strips. I recall seeing the ambulance with the parking lights flashing. There is NO way I could've seen this, I was inside talking to two other EMTS (I have no memory of this) and even if I had been looking out the window, i couldn't have seen this vantage point. I wasn't sure what was going on, but I remember watching him pass me with the gurney and think who else needs help? I've been told that they asked if I felt like I could get on the gurney and I told them yes and got up there. As they were rolling me out. I felt a jolt and then I remember seeing my two girls standing by the door and obviously upset. I had no clue what was going on or where I was going, but I told them I was alright. From there I remember being rolled to the ambulance (no visual of that). I do remember being loaded into the back and an EMT asked me what day of the week and what month it was. To me it felt like an eternity to get an answer to come to me and I think it was wrong. I remember seeing my husband and girls behind the ambulance and being taken into the hospital and having a ton of people working on me at once. From there my recall starts getting better. But I remember seeing a bandaid on my finger and asking what I did. I bit both sides of my tongue during the seizure and didn't even notice it until the Dr asked. I told him no, but when he looked, I had bit my tongue pretty good. I have had two smaller events since then, both occurring while laughing...my upper body started twitching and I started slurring my words and feeling funny, but NOTHING like the first. I saw a neuro and he is horrible. I had my husband take the morning off so he could answer questions about the first event and he didn't ask anything, I got the feeling that he thought I did something to bring this on and he was totally uninterested. He did order an EEG and MRI and told me that they came back ok. I saw him on Monday and he told me that it was "probably just a fluke thing and it probably would never happen again". I had to remind him that I've had two seizures since then and he started me on Keppra (which is horrid), but I told him great, if there is nothing wrong, I will stop taking the Keppra and then his story changed...then it was "well we'd like to see you seizure free for a year before we take you off the medication". I am looking for a second opinion as both my husband and I feel that this man is uninterested in what is going on and inept...but this whole experience has me totally freaked out. What if it happens while I'm alone? My husband thinks that I probably would be dead if he weren't here for this first seizure. Then there's the whole lack of memory or false memory thing that truly disturbs me. As a person that has a memory like an elephant, not knowing what happened during this time is really bothering me. I'm beginning to question if I've just gone crazy with thinking I saw what I saw with the EMT. I understand the brain is a powerful thing and it tries to make sense, but I find it odd to not have any visual recall of being inside, but perfect recall of seeing this EMT. I have actually thought of talking to him to verify the way he went into the house to see if I am correct. It wasn't like what I've heard near death experience or out of body experiences to be...I had almost no awareness. I didn't see angels or Jesus or feel euphoric. There was nothing. Did I fry my brain during this seizure? Has anyone else had this type of experience? I also have been smelling gasoline, not just ordinary gasoline, really rich oily gasoline. It started a couple of days before my seizure and has been pretty much continuous. When will that stop? Thanks for reading this far. I know I sound crazy, but I don't know what to make of this. I feel for anyone else that is going through similar things.