Hi Mugzilla,
Thanks for hearing me out and reading through my reply to you. Believe it or not, you have already taken the first step as you did not walk away from it
I have been in dentistry for 36 yrs.... good Lord that is a long time! I have experienced all kinds of situations with fearful dental patients. I suppose the reason I am so in tune with this fear is because I had it myself and continued to have it for several years even after being in the profession. To this day, I always have some pre anxiety about being in the dental chair and I accept the fact that I always will. My fear began as a child, like yours did, when a dentist was very rough, unkind, verbally abusive, intimidating, and did not use local anesthetic for drilling and filling teeth. My dental appointments were brutal and I hated that man so much. When I decided to go into dentistry at 20 yrs old, it was to help me overcome my fear. Nothing like stepping into a puddle not knowing how deep it is..... but that's me!
The first thing to understand is that poor dental health will cause or contribute to other health problems. So let your overall health be your motivator in pursuing better dental health. Just like you would browse the internet or catalog for a new outfit or shoes, do the same with seeking a new dentist. There are dentists that have a kind, gentle disposition that can put the patient at ease with or without anti anxiety medications. These dentists do what they do because they understand the fear as they have experienced it themselves. It is imperative that you seek someone who is not going to feed your fear with sympathy but someone who is going to comfort you with their devoted attention and kindness. There are dentists who cater to this type of dental patient. Does that sound like something you could do?
The other thing I want to address with you is your belief that this is the only anxiety that you have. Any time you have this type of intense fear, especially when it is due to a physical assault or trauma, it affects you in ways you may be unaware of and it can manifest into other health problems. Hypnotherapy can be extremely helpful in over coming intense fears such as this. I have seen this therapy work wonders with even the most terrified patients. A licensed hypnotherapist can be found online under mental health therapy. Perhaps that is something you would consider doing?
I can tell you from my personal and extensive professional experience that it is possible to overcome this fear well enough to be able to go the dentist without getting yourself sick over it. You have taken the first step..... now it is up to you to accept the significance of how overcoming this fear will benefit your overall health and well being and let that acceptance guide you to finding the right dentist for you.
I have faith that a strong person like yourself can use your strength to make this happen. You are stronger than your fear... you just don't realize that yet. But you will!
We're here when you need to reach out.... keep in touch
Bryanna
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mugzilla
Thank you, Bryanna...
... for such a kind, thoughtful, helpful (and thorough)reply to a complete and total stranger, rambling in a panic, no less! What a generous spirit you have! I'm truly grateful....
....and, if I'm being totally honest, also truly sick to my stomach. I was hoping for "stay on the ibuprofen indefinitely." Just reading about, thinking of, calling for dental appointments/treatment/teeth etc. makes me physically ill. I am not exaggerating. I am not like this in any other area of my life. No other phobias or anxiety issues, very "balanced" for lack of a better word. I was physically and verbally assaulted by the dentist at my very first trip ever right before I turned 5. Following that I had bad, verbally/emotionally abusive and physically painful appointments with another dentist who had no business working with children until I was 13.
I am now 45 and can hardly sit on the edge of a dental chair much less lay back in one...and that is with oral sedation. My anxiety is so high and teeth so "hot" because I go in with a big problem, that I don't get or stay numb for very long and have even had a dentist in tears with me trying to "help" but only making things worse, despite her efforts to the contrary.
Logically, you make perfect sense. I know you are 100% correct about what needs to be done and I appreciate your clarity and honesty. Thank you. Physically and emotionally, however, I simply cannot even entertain the thought...with or without pre-meds, with or without a friend, with or without teeth! I might as well climb Mt. Everest....barefoot and without ropes...that's the kind of challenge this is for me. Cleanings, fillings, crowns are all bad enough but an extraction and implant or whatever comes next...I'm sorry. I can't. Welcome to my top 3 "worst evers"...Death, divorce, and the dentist.
I will reread your kind reply, though, a few times, and take your suggestions to heart. Maybe the shock will wear off a little. I did ask for your advice and it seems only fair I let it sink in a little before firing off a fearful "thanks but no thanks" and heading for the hills. It would certainly help if I could picture an understanding, gentle, empathetic dentist who wasn't afraid or uncomfortable around me. Then again, it is hard to picture what you've never seen before.
With gratitude,
Mugzilla
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