Dont beat yourself up over what coulda shoulda woulda. If for any moment you thought your baby was in danger you would have sprang into action.

In 1991, the same day Bush Sr. gave us shock and awe in the first Iraq war. Our oldest son got a piece of meat lodged in his throat. It nearly killed him, but it wasnt what was really wrong. He had esophageal cancer, and he couldnt even get a drop of water down.

As he was growing up he did a very gross thing that we tried and tried to discourage, but he would just hide his ability to swallow his food then bring it up later to chew. Well from those years of all that is what caused the cancer. Not only that but he had lost a lot of weight, but we thought it was from him walking 20 or more miles a day in 100 degree heat.

We tried to get him to take the bus, but he loved to walk and talk. You see he is a bit challenged. About 8 years old mentally, but able to fool everyone he meets for a little while.

We felt aweful when the doctor told us he had a 5% chance to live. Your mind races with all the things you coulda woulda shoulda done. After a major surgery to remove the esophagus, and a year of chemo he beat this cancer.

I know you have done everything in your power. It is terrible, but it is not your fault. You are such a caring loving person and it tears me up thinking about your situation.

Put you and your family on a prayer chain we have going.
Much love and 's to you and yours.