lol

The other night I was sitting around the corner on my friend's porch, with several other neighbors. It was about 6:30 p.m. They were all shooting the breeze and saying "you think it's going to rain, you think we'll get a thunderstorm?"

I just calmly said "in 30 minutes or less". They looked at me like I was nuts and the 75 year old lady said "now how the heck do you know that?" I said 'my wrist just told me' and we all laughed.

Then I said "no, it's not going to be 30 minutes, more like 15". Then they really got spooked. Then my right knee did a thing that made me stand up and say "I'm going home, I don't want to be caught". Well, as I got off the porch, the rain started.

Ever see people burst out laughing, scratch their heads and go "oh my god".

I just said "when you have arthritis, believe me, you are the next weatherman for Eyewitness News"

Never fails. But the worst time is when the weathe (and I know I'm talking about the weather like it's alive or something) but the past few days, that's exactly what's been happening.

My skin has been itchy, (forget about my knees and wrists), but the body just reacts to the ozone, or whatever the air is pumping out.

Take for example yesterday. It rained cats and dogs in the morning and I had to go to the post office wearing a heavy sweater because it was chilly.
Then the sun came out and you could have roasted a chicken. That was when I was able to stand upright and go for my power walk, wearing my ipod. No problem. Then two hours later, the clouds came out and it rained and I got caught in another downpour.

And this morning I couldn't bend my left wrist. So I just put my splint on it and went out. Got to keep moving or I'll never move. That's how I look at my arthritis and PN and whatever the else nature throws at me.

I've had arthritis since I"m 40, scoliosis since I'm 50 and god knows what they'll tell me I have when I'm 65. But I'll still be me and taking my B-12 methyl. That's how I fight it.

Yeah, my feet burn when the weather doesn't know what it wants to do. I walk in the living room and say "Alan, are your feet on fire?" and he goes "oh my god, yes". Then we look outside and it's cloudy and thick with humidity.
We really should move to the desert.

But since I can't stand any kind of bugs and I'll probably die if I saw one, and all our doctors are here, well, here we will stay.

The other night I went into the bathroom, and I was brushing my teeth when all of a sudden I saw a big brown thing with legs right on top of my faucet. Now I'm 60 years old, not a small woman, but why on earth did i react the way I did. Is it a girly thing??? I have no answer for what happened next.

I had tunnel vision. When I looked at the faucet, I saw only the waterbug. My eyes only saw IT!!! Not the toilet bowl, not the sink, not even my toothbrush, my eyes just saw the bug and I started screaming. I ran out of the bathroom and Alan came running into the kitchen. He thought I fell or had a heart attack because I had my hands over my chest. Now the irony was that my heart was not beating out of my chest. I have never had a panic attack, never got short of breath in my life, or had difficulty breathing. That is not what happened. I just remained in the kitchen saying over and over "oh, oh, oh". Alan said "what happened" and I just blurted out "get in that bathroom and kill that thing".

Alan starts lauging and goes into the bathroom and says 'where is it?" I said 'what do you mean, where is it, it's on the faucet" and he goes "Oh there's the sucker, it's under the faucet", I got it, it's gone".

Think I was alright after that?? No, I remained in the kitchen saying "oh oh oh". I took a can of bug spray and sprayed the drains, the pipes, the crooks and corners. I told Alan to open up the bottom of the bathroom cabinet and he goes "I'm not opening up anything, what if they start coming out, I have to go to work (this happened at 9:55 p.m. on Friday night.)

So I opened up the cabinet with the can of bug spray in my hand ready to do battle and there was nothing there. I sprayed all over the place and closed the cabinet.

Since that happened, when I get up, I tip toe in the bathroom and I won't do anything until I check the bathtub, and the sink, and everywhere.

Now what is wrong with me?? It was s stupid waterbug for goodness sake.

I haven't had one of those in my home for quite a few years but people do get a waterbug once in a while. But I have a thing about bugs. I kept sayng "if he's the grandfather, he's never seeing his family again, there will be no family reunion". My neighbors were hysterical on the porch because as I walked Alan out the door I stayed on the porch with my neighbors and I wouldn't go back in the house for 30 minutes.

What is this, some kind of anxiety disorder about waterbugs, or am I so neurotic that I over -reacted.

I bet plenty of you, the ones who go fishing and clean your own fish, and bait your own hooks, I bet you would just kill the stupid bug and be done with it. I'm still walking around my house on tip toes.

Alan kept laughing and saying "Oh, these waterbugs are like my army buddies when I was in the barracks. We had things flying over our heads so big, I thought I was in the movie "THEM".

Believe me, if I was in an army barracks, and something flew over my head, I would die right there on the spot.

Any of you feel like I do about bugs???

Melody