Ellie
I think Doody's tuff luv is right on the mark when it comes to what you are having to endure and suffer because of your brother.
But, I know all too well from having witnessed my mom's struggles with her sister, who did similar to her, but rather than beating, would cut up her clothes etc and certainly assault her verbally and emotionally continuously.......yet my mom loved my aunt so deeply, and ached for her continuously, despite the abuse that she had suffered from her. And the torment she went thru every time my aunt would either threaten or "attempt" to kill herself, always blaming someone, and usually blaming my mom.
I am thankful that in their case, my aunt got treatment and cleaned up, about 25 years ago, and was dx with bipolar, which certainly explained the extremes she suffered. She changed dramatically after that and they again became close, my aunt maintained her treatment till she died in her late 70s last year. My mom misses her deeply.
So dear Ellie
I dont know if that gives you hope that a miracle CAN happen for you brother and I sure pray it will.
In the meantime tho, I echo what Doody said.
Your brother isnt just hurting his own life....he is hurting yours, his daughter's and who knows how many others.
He needs help.
And you cant be his physical OR emotional punchbag anymore.
He is responsible for his life Ellie. Not you.
If you need to continue loving him from a total distance and cut him out till he gets help, then that is what you have to do. You have quite enough on your own plate to have to carry his too.
I so wish we had more adequate funding for good and careful mental healthcare in the prison systems. I really feel that more people would come out of jail in better shape than when they went in, and possibly not end up there again, if the root cause of some of the reasons they are in there were correctly dx and treated............. but that is another discussion
Right now, I just want to give you another
and let you know you, and your brother will be in my thoughts and prayers Ellie
