I am living in my parents' home country. I can't stand it here. I screwed up my chances of getting a green card through work, when I had the chance. Made bad choices. OH, it looked fine at the time... Goin' to California... woohoo. Yeah. Well, in California, most of what happened was me missing Florida. AND, bird in hand is worth two in the bush. The jjob there wasn't all it was cracked up to be, it sucked, they milked people like cows. I am not a cow Ginnie, I will never be a cow. Some people will do anything to get what they want. Not me. But you know, probably I would have been their cow if I had realized then that screwing up would have landed me in my parents' country that calls me a citizen by heritage, but where I feel like a foreigner, and am taken for a foreigner. I grew up also a "foreigner" in the islands, wehre again, I have citizenship by birthright. But my heritage is different. I am a cultural misfit, but the US is good with cultural misfits. We fit in. Everybody is a cultural mix, so it's ok.

I am tired of being a foreigner. It sucks. I even have an accent now. People mistake me for American.... the only thing I am not... but would be if I could.

I can just see you, in my mind's eye, working on that frog. I would looooove to see a pic of that frog... it sounds wonder. I really really miss my arts and crafts. I used to do all kinds of things. Maybe not big things like you. But speaking of frogs -- I love froggies btw... I used to make little pompom critters. Like for hanging on car mirrors or wherever. I made a few as fridge magnets. I don't have the working room staying with my parents, and don't anywhere near have the place even to store my craft materials in the apartment. I miss all that stuff so badly. I used to draw too, and sometimes paint. And play guitar and sing. It's all gone. I feel as though I live in a limbo prison.

waves