life just isn't a rocky road, is is outright a mountain at times. We not always equipped to deal with the mountain. I know about the depressions too, and wanting to take my life. I have had those feelings too. I became sick, my daughter abandoned me, with her husband while I was sick over a trust. I have never even seen a picture of my grandchildren, now 5 years old and 2. The pain from both my health and this issue took all my effort, and that of Gods too, to get me to the point of being OK mentally again. I did get council, and lots of it to deal with those losses. I am selling my house now, medicare/medicaid, don't allow you to even keep a paid for home.
I accept hope. That whatever comes to us, with the help of friends, yes here at NT too, and my faith, that we can deal with these issues that get dumped into our lives. Nobody asks to get sick or become disabled, or expect to lose your home.. We don't ask for the pain and trouble that visits us.
Keep right here, and you will find so many of us that have had to go through some life altering bad experiences, and then come out on top. Even people with terrible disease and pain, find a measure of joy each day.
I never thought I would feel OK again. Try to be good to yourself, and remember you have value as a human being and contribute to this world. We are all interconnected and distant relatives to each other. You are not alone in this. You found a forum that has some outstanding compassionate humans. Hang in there. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. ginnie