How have you all been? I was hospitalized for suicide. As a result I started getting ECT every week initially now once every two weeks. They make me feel so much better but I am turning into a hermit. I mean if there is something that I must do like get groceries, I can but I am a stress case the whole time. I have four people I talk to and no more. I am supposed to be moving in with my parents with in the year but now I fear losing my freedom. I am having a really tough time. I am miserable. I wish I had an ECT this week. I am always fired up after them and feel great. The VA has decided to reassess my rating and they have decided to take away my special compensation and they think I don't need it anymore when in reality, my condition has declined. I had to have my doctor write a letter to them and now I wait for their reply. I miss you guys and glad I finally logged in again.