My brother in law didn't want me to see my sister today. I found out that my niece,and her new son,and my bol were with my sister at the hospital after that today according to FB timeline. I new that she was coming.

The only conclusion that there could be is that my bol didn't want me at the occasion,and I feel sick in my stomach,and heart about this. He was very vocal about how he didn't want me to be there today. He didn't meantion anything about my niece,but I'm not stubid,and wonder why he thought that I wouldn't find out about this. The only other conclusion that I can think of is that He didn't care about me being there at this occasion,or even if I would find out. What am I? A nothing who doesn't feel anything.

I feel sick,unwanted,extremely unwanted,unloved in the family,and nobody cared for me to be there. I could write fifty pages of my feelings about wanting to be there at the occasion.

I don't know what to do. I feel so bad that I might call the emergency hotline,but I've done that before,and they were not very helpful. I was just another troubled person on the phone.