HannaJane,

I'm so sorry you're at such a low point. You're not a burden. And you're not alone. Most people reading this have either been where you are or are where you are, and you're helping them feel less alone just by reaching out and posting.

What helped me at my low point(s), was understanding that it wasn't MY pain I was dealing with. It was my body's pain. And my body is not me.

It doesn't make the pain any less real, but that singular realization unlocks many possibilities.