thanks waves. the thing about harriet was the vet said if we did the surgery it would buy us more time with her to say good bye, no cure. so we had him do the debulking surgery. She had oral/gum cancer. He said that is what he would do. after the surgery she just seeped and drained/drooled. We don't know when she stopped eating her dry cat food it probably hurt with draining gums and such. I don't know. She lost weight but I was in denial (I did not love on her like I should have just watched her lie there probably in pain). and she was very affectionate with my hubby sitting in his lap every morning but after 2 months I gave her some wet cat food, she really went after it then over the coarse of a few days stopped eating that, we assumed the cancer had spred to her nasal passages and interferred with her smell the important part in eating for a cat or if she was in pain, probably both. I don't remember giving her any pain meds. After 7 days of not eating the wet food we put her down, I did not want to watch her whither away. So the day that we were bringing her in a sat with her on my bed and she came and layed on my chest briefly like she used to do. So we brought her in. She was my cat so my decision. I held her in the car and she struggled a bit on the way over there, the vet said she had lost a lot of weight she must have stopped eating the dry food long before that. In the end It was very peaceful. I carried her home and we burried her in our back yard next to hobbes. I have never cried/ loved/ an animal ( or humane) like that before.
sigh
Our vet did not charge us to put her down and he sent us a flower to the house the next day which was very sweet.
Sitting here crying over harriet, Jeff just gave me a hug but told me this was a waste of emotional energy. I am still grieving her. I loved her and did not show it in the end. Jeff did I did not. This is why I feel badly about her.
Jeff was sweet and bought me a grave marker of a curled up cat. I could not bear to put it outside on her grave I wanted it close to me so it is in the living room where I can see it and think of her.
Just grieving this morning....
bizi