Thank you Hopeless and Mrs. D.

I definitely have that the inclination to take care of people and attract people that are inclined to take advantage of that, lol. I just don't have the ability to be very dependable anymore. One of the reasons I post actively on the SS disability forum is so that I can give back and fulfill that need to help, but I can depend on others that are just as capable, if not more so, if I'm not up to it.

I don't think she's looking to take advantage of me, but rather she wants an equally unhealthy, enmeshed relationship. She's worried about me, she's sending her bf over with food, asking if I need her to run errands, etc. (Part of the issue is that my son had been living with me for almost a year, and he just moved cross country for another internship. It is a big adjustment, but I can manage.) I haven't taken her up on any of the "favors" and I make a point to bake or cook for her as well when I'm feeling at my best, so that things don't become one sided. What I've found over the years is that there are times when I really do need help, but it's way less complicated to pay for it rather than depend on friends. --I probably should avoid family help as well, but that's tougher, for a variety of reasons.

And when I lost my patience with her, I explained that there is a component of depression with RSD/CRPS, but I've DONE the work in therapy to be confident that depression is a symptom, not a cause. And from what she said in response, I do think she's trying to project her own issues on to me. I had assumed she had seen a psych doc at some point, but apparently she's just self diagnosing.

I can call my former therapist if I have an emergency, but I haven't needed to speak with him in a few years. Having everybody here to bounce ideas off of, is a BIG help.