Thank you all for reaching out to me. You have no idea how much I appreciate your words, ideas and sharing your stories helps me along this journey.

There's a note for PamelaJune, Rrae, Eva, and Gerry at the end of this post.

After posting here, I had me a good cry. It was either that or end this pain permanently (which is not an option/but I certainly understand what makes it one for others). Gathered my notebook, made it up to date with everything I've been told about Stim, right thru to today. Then I went thru my 5options for Stim. I played with each one jotting notes on each then naming them. Think I have that part down. The leaning curve hahaha none of them are even close to aiding my back. The pain originates there. The more movement the more pain I experience. Even basic personal tasks like cooking, showering; then household stuff can crank this baby to point I'm angry with myself on why I don't ask my dr,. For a wheelchair. Such a confusing mess.

Sent my Rep a text (so I had it in writing) and told him I'm quite sure the lead has moved. It is doing so/so on my legs but its throwing both my calves into fits. I can hardly stand or walk that's how bad they are. Perhaps I'm having spasms during the Stim/perhaps its the stim in general and this is what others feel.

He asked if I could go to PM tomorrow for a "tweek" and see if he can get better coverage. The unit gets removed Tuesday. I agreed on tomorrow just so I know I can say I have tried everything.

Did you have any strange things going on with your body during stim? My hands and feet are swollen. I never ever deal with this. Got it Tuesday and I am unable to sleep. I don't even get sleepy. Tuesday I figured it was all the pain/emotions from procedure. But I'm still unable to!

I see him tomorrow at 9:30. Will let you know what happens. Thank you so very much for responding to me. I have more info to take tomorrow thanks to you!



Gerry: I too have been told I will probably still need pain meds. Right now I'm truly asking what the point of all this is! Do you get good pain control in that your still able to move about without the pain returning until around the next dose? What I'm on gives me relief for my basic tasks. Throw a short 30 minute shopping trip and I'm screwed til the next dose. Mine are 12 hours apart. I sure don't blame you for not wanting to do this again.

Eva - thank you for being with me in spirit! I am taking notes but you gave me even more to add, and so I've done just that. Thank you. Its hard to think when coping with intense pain.

Rrae - thank you for responding to me during my meltdown phase. I was going down fast. You and PamelaJune gave me enough to tighten my grip and keep holding on. I've been trying stem now and then. I guess I think magically its going to arrange itself where it needs to be I keep on trying. It has my calves hurting quite bad. You've given me hope to keep on with this. Those first two pain free days are still on my mind!

PamelaJune - thank you for responding to my post. You and Rrae gave me hope to cling to. I was at the end of my witts with this entire process. The things you said about pain and the body moving made so much sense! This has been the worst procedure I've ever gone through. People like you reaching out have made it much easier to bare.