This is a big topic of discussion among the forum's TBI moms.

Before I say anything else, I would like to stress that the vast majority of TBI patients make excellent recoveries. Chances are that you will get better and go on to have your family, without the burden of a chronic condition.

Sadly, I am in the unhappy minority. My child was four when I was injured. It has been a hard journey, for both of us.

I think most of my peers would agree that how well one fares as a TBI mom depends of one's symptoms. Does one still have the capacity to engage emotionally with other people? How fatigued does one feel? Is there enough energy for a child? More importantly, is there enough patience?

Despite my best efforts, since my TBI, I have trouble controlling my temper. I can morph, on a dime, into the "mommy monster."

I have never been physically violent with my child, but she has been subjected to loud, verbal outbursts. I can see that it has taken a toll on her and that makes my heart ache. To be perfectly frank, I believe that she would have been better off if I had died in my MVA. I try, but my TBI has made me an inadequate parent.

I know that's probably not what you wanted to hear. However, raising a child is the most important thing anyone can ever do. I think it's incumbent upon everyone (not just TBI patients) to think long and hard about the NEEDS OF THE CHILD, before opting to take on the awesome responsibility of parenthood.

That you're asking these questions now, tells me that you're a good person and I hope you have the chance to be a great mom.