Hi ,I'm new to this forum but I have been suffering from OCD for quite a long time since I was a kid, I believe.

I am having a kind of OCD that I often need something unnecessary perfect to be perfect, I consciously know that it's a wrong and a big no-no , but I just simply cannot overcome the thoughts and it's affecting my daily life.

Example,
I had OCD with the music CD of my favorite singer, the CD worked perfectly fine and everything looks alright, but I liked to inspect in details, should there be any slight scratch on the CD, I would feel so bad for quite some time, I consciously know I was wrong, I was stupid, but I couldn't overcome that kind of feeling.

And then later on
Mobile phone OCD - still existing now, I feel so bad when there is even a slight scratch on the surface of the mobile phone that doesn't affect any functionality of the phone.

In fact, in recent years my OCD shift from 'physical' levels to 'digital' levels, which is more hard to overcome by myself. For example, I am still a huge fans of electronic devices, from laptops to tablet PC to computer, when they are still working like new, I am often suffering from a thought that these devices are not actually working perfectly 'behind'. A lot of time I don't take things like most normal people - 0 or 1 , Yes or No , Good or bad. I always have silly thought about 'bad' when something is actually 'good'.

For example, when I dine out at a clean restaurant with good hygiene and reputation, and waiting to enjoy my favorite dishes, as the dishes arrive, everything looks alright and great, sometimes I would have a lot of silly thoughts rising up in my mind. For example - uh... is it perfectly clean? was it sniffed by the cook inside the kitchen and so his dirt landed on the food?? Was it touched by his bare uncleaned hand ?

I know I will never have answers to these questions and thoughts and I know I won't even ask because I know it would be understood to be silly or insane
. However, these silly doubts and thoughts keep my mind busy and affect my daily life.


Yes, I know the best bet is to see a doctor and tell him everything, but sometimes we cannot see a doctor for many many reasons. If I would visit a doctor, I would not have posted a thread here. I hope you can understand.

Thank you for understanding and help.