Pat,
Forces nurses are special people - thank you for your 28 years.
I hope you feel after that post as I did when I struggled through my extended Bio, a lightening of my mood knowing I had finally gotten everything off my chest.
Lara is right (as usual) to point you to the SCS Forum, but don't forget the Depression Forum - and other places for support - as well.
I am sorry you have such little relief from meds, perhaps it would be worthwhile mentioning local anaesthetic Infusions (Lidocaine or Ketamine). They are shown to work wonders on many chronic pain conditions.
Far too many of us have been in 'That Place', myself included all too frequently. Please read the Stickys in the Survivors of Suicide Forum. (Sorry, I must learn to do links, but I'm a technophobe). The important thing is that you are getting help, and you can find much more support in the interim right here.
I hope to see you around the Forums, and read of significant improvement as time passes.

Dave