Hi D,
I am sorry to hear you are also taking care of a husband who is ill.
I live with my husband who is healthy but my 91 yr old Mom with dementia lives with us for the last 3 yrs. What little extra rest time and energy I had during the day is zapped by her needs.

I actually have an answer for the ceiling cobwebs. They have these extender poles with a duster thing on the end. We have a woman who comes to do heavy cleaning once a month and she uses one. If too expensive, if you can still vacuum, just take the attachment off the end and hold the straight part as high as you can hold near the cobweb, you would be surprised how the suction can pull them in. even if a foot or more away.

Try this to help wash glasses/dishesmaybe try this...I used to tend bar and we used a version of this.
It sticks by suction cup to bottom of sink.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00...JNPQ8250JFKNHN

Another tip a friend taught me. To wash the floor easily, take an old bath towel, soak in hot water and wring out as best you can, then just throw it on the floor and drag it around with a sponge mop or broom....the hot water gets all the dirt off and you can clean an area quickly. I use 2 or 3 old towels and then just wash them....or tie the towels on the dog and let him drag them around!

You certainly are not alone on needing to adjust your standards for clean.
I guess we need to adjust our standards for alot of things when we are unwell.
My worst issue is clutter....I make myself, and my hubby, nuts.

Take care, D.