when packing all my stuff i found so many little things that evoked memories... nostalgia was everywhere. nostalgia inside, chaos outside. things gradually got boxed and left. finally one saturday, most of the rest left.

and then there was this stufflessness, weightlessness.

i went to my parents today, to drop off a big heavy bag, since i realized there would be too much for one trip. i walked in and was immediately assaulted by the view of the bags-boxes-suitcases-otherstuffer.... lined up in the living room. all the chaos i had been living in, and now free of, was lined up in front of me at my parents'. i exclaimed out loud and my dad sniggered and (he hatttes clutter) said when he sees all that stuff he feels augh. and then asked if i ever wondered wouldn't it be nice just not to have anything at all. i zaid very zen.

he said if someone asks you for slipper, you can't give them one - you don't have one to give. somehow that didn't sound anything to do with zen but we were both on to the same thing... living free of material responsibility.

i don't have the courage - the nostalgia takes me in. also i am an almost fanatic recycler/reuser, so i have trouble "just tossing" something.

one thing a friend and i do, when each of us "can't" give away something but needs to, is send it to the other of us, who has no attachment to it. only problem is i have one of her dresses i actually patched up but still haven't got around to changing the buttons...

there goes that strategy of simplicity.

~ waves ~ wavering and still wanting that shower.