Hi Tessa,
You have far too much on your plate for one person to handle. I am really sorry for the situation you find yourself in, and without help you are likely to make yourself ill.
Take Malia's advice if you can. Is there a Minister you can talk to to give you a little support?
Of course, coming here to our Forums has opened a line of support from members who are suffering all kinds of issues - the point is, we understand.
Even typing out your problems, and sharing them, can be theraputic. Knowing that people care can be of great benefit.
I do not know what to do about your Husband's behaviour, be it caused by drink, TBI, or both, I am not a Counsellor, but I do know stress and difficult times can quickly lead to Depression. That can cause all manner of other problems, and needs addressing at the first signs. In your situation you need your mental strength.
Come here to talk, to vent, whatever you need - but don't neglect yourself in the outside World.

Dave.