Thank you so so much for your reply Dave.

I never let him see my anxiety usually anyway much and never about his operation and this medical issue, he thinks I'm totally calm about it all and not worried, I just keep telling him it'll all be fine and how he's got a life to look forward to getting back afterwards. But then all he talks about is how i'ts going to go wrong, death or paralyzed and I'm petrified of that, not that I ever let him know it. I've had bad anxiety problems all my life (I'm 33) so know how to hide it pretty well. I'm on Citalopram anti-depressant that's used for anxiety as well.

He's now on Citalopram as well as he was very very down and was having panic attacks. He's also on blood pressure medication and some tablets to help him sleep. It's just with the operation being on Thursday it's really happening now and he's not coping, keeps saying he's going to break down before we get to the hospital or want to back out.

He's totally focusing on the 1% disaster rate with this operation that's all, he always thinks the worst and he's sure it's going to happen to him. And then he sets me off worrying although I don't say it as I said.

Thank you for the words of encouragement anyway Dave, it means a lot thank you. And you're right getting all worked up won't solve anything, breathe and calm I'll keep repeating that.